Rollercoasters

I knew adoption was going to be a rollercoaster ride of emotions.  And that is just what it has been.  Thankfully, God has granted me peace throughout this process, so the lows aren't that low.  I know that God has a plan, I know that in the end, no matter how long, we will have a baby.

My desire of this blog was to be very open with you.  I want this blog to be informative but mostly educational.  For those of you who want to adopt, I want you to know our story, and what I know.  When I read adoption forums, I read over and over, potential adoptive parents, not telling anyone their progress.  They are too afraid of the pain if things don't work out, which happens often.  If that is how they need to cope, then I applaud them for protecting themselves.  I, however, want to share.  I want to share our joy and pain.  I want you to know about it so you can pray.  I want you to know about it so you can learn.

Despite what I have heard, our homestudy was painless.  There was a lot of paperwork to gather, but it was fairly easy to obtain.  The interviews weren't difficult, either.  The twenty pages of background information that we had to answer, was the most painful (for me because I hate writing--so you see the pain I'm experiencing right now).

The emotional rollercoaster began at our last homestudy visit.  Our social worker shared with us a specific situation.  This is when your emotions got involved.  Before this, you can only guess how long, what the birthmother will be like, where she'll live, when she's due, if the baby is healthy, etc.  But it becomes very real, when that information is given to you.  At our last homestudy visit, our social worker told us about an expectant mother.  She said she lived in Georgia and wanted a very open adoption with the potential adoptive parents coming to her prenatal doctor visits.  However, at that point she didn't know what gender the baby was.  Since we want a boy, we were excited about the prospects but cautious.

That conversation was on March 7.  Since then we hadn't learned much more about the situation except the mother's name.  Last week, I was told that she was supposed to find out what she was having.  But I still haven't gotten any updates. For me, the waiting is the hardest.

Then Monday night, we got some exciting news.  I received an email from our social worker letting us know that she wanted to present a case to us.  She said that the expectant mother lived within hour of us and was due April 16!! I have not been able to fall asleep at night for the last two nights because I am so excited! I even ran out and bought an outfit to bring the baby home in.  I know that might be early, but I figured the outfit will be good for several months, and if we don't have a baby by then, I can take it back.

As with the ups, there are downs...I got an email today, that the above situation is on hold.  I don't know what that means, and I don't have any more information that that.  So as we continue to wait, we pray.  We pray for those to expectant mothers. We pray for those babies.  We pray God guides our steps down the right path.  And we thank God for this experience, because it is amazing, even with the lows.  And we thank God for all our friends and family praying along with us.

Here is the outfit I bought.  Can't wait to put a baby in it!